I’m basically uncoachable. Like a recalcitrant child, I simply refuse to follow directions. And as a lifetime athlete, this has been, um, let’s just say, problematic.
I don’t try to be a pain in the ass. I’m just naturally that way. Just ask anyone. Okay, maybe don’t do that. I want you to keep liking me and reading my blog. So, just take my word for it. I. Am. A. Big. Pain.
It’s not that I get mean or snotty (okay, sometimes I do, but that’s usually because I’m carb deprived. Or caffeine deprived. Or sleep deprived. Or it’s Wednesday.). Rather, I just don’t do what I’m supposed to. Basically, I pay someone to tell me what to do, and then ignore them.
And it’s not just to be difficult. Really. I just can’t do what they say because:
1. Too much structure in anything makes me grumpy.
2. I want running to stay fun, and if it’s all drills and stuff, then it won’t be fun anymore.
3. I truly can’t follow directions to save my life.
4. I don’t like wearing a watch, which makes a structured workout difficult.
5. I’m convinced I know everything despite the overwhelming evidence suggesting otherwise.
6. You’re not the boss of me.
Because of this inability (ahem, unwillingness) to take direction, my workouts never match what has been given to me.
Scheduled Workout:
1 mile warmup; 6 x 1 mile at 6:30 pace with 2 minutes recovery; 1 mile cool down
Actual Workout:
8 miles with something close to a 6:30 pace thrown in whenever a fast song comes up on my iPod.
Scheduled Workout:
2 x 10 miles (morning and evening), easy pace.
Actual Workout:
1 x 20 miles (morning). I have a life to live, hellllooooo?
Scheduled Workout:
1 x 20 miles at an easy pace.
Actual Workout:
1 x 8 miles at whatever the hell pace I feel like, so there.
1 x 4 miles fast (I think. I didn’t want the guy behind me to pass me.)
1 x 8 miles at whatever pace the ABBA Gold album dictates
So, if I’m so uncoachable, why, you ask, do I continue to work with coaches? Because I like to talk about running ALL THE TIME and normal people get bored easily. I’m basically buying friends. OCD friends. Friends who have to talk about running for as long as I want (or an hour, whichever comes first). Even if I have to pay them.
And I think that’s a fair trade off.
Happy Running!
Mom, ultrarunner, four-time US 24 Hour National Team member, adventure athlete, food writer. Graduate of the Pro Cooking Program at the New School of Cooking, Los Angeles. Will run for food.
{ 14 comments }
I’ve always considered myself uncoachable because I need a coach to tell me EXACTLY why I’m doing a certain workout and they never can; I know more than they do, and no one knows me better than I do, so I feel I can ignore them. Plus, I’m contrarian by nature.
I could work around all your limitations, but the incessant chatter is only fun if I don’t think I’m obligated to listen.
I think we should be friends! I want to get a coach this year and one very real reason (although I try not to admit to anyone) is so that I can obsessively talk about running without the other person wanting to hit me over the head. Because if I’m paying them, they kind of half to listen to every single running thought I have, right?
Now tell me Carilyn; do you follow the same line of reasoning (or perhaps non-reasoning when you coach other? Or do you find some inner (demented – no thats to harsh) satisfaction in making OTHERS follow instructions?
Incessant chatter?! Say what? Come on now, Steve? I would only drive you crazy after about 5 minutes! 🙂
Absolutely, Alison! That is the BEST reason to have a coach! Really, in my experience, most runners don’t listen to anyone, so you might as well enjoy the chatting 🙂
It’s totally demented, Kent! And totally true! 🙂
I see no problem with your interpretations of the workouts. Maybe that’s why I am not a coach!
I glad I’m not the only one!! I agree with reasons 1-6, except #4 – I always wear my watch. That doesn’t mean I pay attention to it, but I like having a record of the run.
I’d rather run at my own pace and not set a PR in the next race than lose the enjoyment of running for the sake of that PR.
Besides, I’ve learned my 65 year old body responds with injuries when I push it too hard.
Love your blog!
As far as I can tell, you’re using your program pretty much the way I use mine – as a loose guide. When I go way off program and unwisely blog about it ( because, yes, I AM that dumb) I have to make sure I’ve got a new batch of cupcakes ready for my coach to stop him getting angry with me. He still hasn’t worked out how I manipulate him – I might be dumb but he’s dumber.
Thanks for stopping by, Rick! And yes, I agree with you that keeping running fun is the most important part. 🙂
You are too funny, Char! And I may have to steal the cupcake trick!
Thank you, Marcia! Now if only my coach would agree!
Ok. Then I definitely need a coach, because I am a nerd and need to have more people with which to chat about running. But I would never do my proper workouts, I’m pretty sure. I have a lot of respect for people who can follow every mile as planned. I am not that person! (That’s why I am following three training plans at once, see?)
As for you, you know enough about running to know that all of your changes = same workout, kind of, right?
Yes, Rebecca, having someone who is forced to listen to you is the best! 🙂
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