Trusting oneself, I believe, is probably one of the hardest tasks we are assigned in this life. At least, for me. I often make gut-level decsions, only to feel guilty about them later, so I retract them and go a different route. But, ironically the gut-level decision was almost always the right decision in the long run. Today, I had a minor reminder of this. I was running my usual route, and a little bored with it. I saw a trail off to the side, so I took it. But after a little while, I got concerned. I didn’t know where the trail went, and I seemed to be alone, so I turned back. As I was leaving the trail, a man appeared and asked me if I was trying to get on the trail system. I said “yes”. He told me he was running a 6 mile loop and I was free to join him. Normally, I would balk at this, but he had the look and vibe we know so well – a real runner.
We headed down the trail, and for the first time since I have been in California, I felt the adrenaline of excitement at the prospect of a great run. There was nothing technical about these trails, but it was so nice to be in the company of another runner, I could have cried! For over two months I have run alone, a situation I mostly enjoy. But I didn’t realize how much I missed company on some of my runs until I ran into Don. Turns out, Don is a running coach and a member of the Los Feliz Flyers. He runs a track interval workout every week and really seems to know his stuff. We talked non-stop the whole run. He gave me so much information on running in the area, that I was really excited about my new running route options. No, I’m not ready to race again, yet, but I felt the tingling of excitement at the idea of really running again. It has been a long time.
I’m still cooking like a maniac – my poor kids never know what they’re going to have to try next.
Breakfast Frittata Muffin and Toasted Crepe with Fig Preserves
And I am having so much fun with it. But, there is some relief in feeling the happiness I know and love from a good run.
Happy Running!
Mom, ultrarunner, four-time US 24 Hour National Team member, adventure athlete, food writer. Graduate of the Pro Cooking Program at the New School of Cooking, Los Angeles. Will run for food.
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You know, trusting myself is not easy. Right now I am trusting that I don’t want to run – and scarily, not sure I will want to race any time soon. I was hoping I’d pick a goal and thsi is what usually spurs me into running more, but nothing excites me right now, not a single race, anywhere…I want to live so much more life, but racing has been a part of me for so long, I am not sure how to make a switch. Where to go. And how to stay in good shape and not let the body expand:)
I so understand what you are saying, Olga. Running is such a big part of our lives that it is hard to let it go, even temporarily. But, as you say, there is so much more to life, and sometimes we have to put running on the backburner. You have had a stellar running career, and I have to believe that is because you listen to your instincts and train hard when it feels right, and back off when it doesn’t. You seem to actually be very good at trusting yourself!
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