Phone call with my non-running friend, Leslie:
Leslie: So, I read your blog post about your race. I don’t get it.
Me: What part?
Leslie: The whole thing.
Me: That’s a lot.
Leslie: Explain it to me.
Me: Explain what?
Leslie: Like how you can run for 78 miles and get fatter. What’s the point?
Me: I didn’t get fatter, I got bloated.
Leslie: Whatever. You got bigger AFTER running for hours. Isn’t that like the exact opposite purpose of exercise?
Me: Well, yes, but like I said, I didn’t get fatter. It was temporary.
Leslie: And you puked for a couple of hours?
Me: Yes, unfortunately, that’s usually part of it.
Leslie: AND you ended bigger than you started? After hours of running AND puking?
Me: Okay, I’m not going to keep having this conversation. I DID NOT get fatter!
Leslie: Basically, it sucks AND you get fatter. Great sport.
Me: Whatever. I see you didn’t like the post.
Leslie: The only thing that made any sense was that you needed to get a boob job.
Me: I have to go.
Leslie: I’m just sayin’.
Lesson: Check caller ID after a race and don’t answer calls from non-runners. Or, just lie in your race reports.