topamax 100mg coupons

I really want doughnuts. Plural. Like a box of doughnuts. Cake doughnuts with icing and sprinkles. Apple Fritters. Simple, light and fluffy glazed doughnuts.


If you read this blog, you know I’ve figured out that too much sugar makes me feel blerg. I don’t sleep well, my energy level goes up and down all day, and I can end up sporting a doughnut-like layer of blubber around my middle despite running 20 miles a day.


I still want doughnuts. All. The. Doughnuts.

This quandry has led me to…adulting. I’ve always been a believer in “eat what your body craves”. I think our bodies are much smarter than we think. We are so conditioned to abdicate responsibility for what we really need, that by the time we reach a certain age, we have no idea what that even is.

When I first started running competitively, I always ran fasted. Wake up. Glass of water. Run. No food, no Gatorade. I didn’t know any better. I did my long runs with a few fig newtons and water. During races, I avoided the aid stations and just ate stuff I was craving – peanut butter, hamburgers, Starbucks double shots with extra cream. The night before big races, I ate a steak with a loaded baked potato (butter, sour cream, bacon, and cheese).

As the years went by, I was told I wasn’t “fueling properly”. I needed to be consuming 250 calories per hour from carbs while training and racing, and then make sure I sucked down MORE carbs immediately afterward so that I recovered properly. AND, I needed to carb load the night before races. If not, surely I would DIE! The experts told me so. (Not really. No one told me I would die. But they did tell me I would suck. And I definitely didn’t want to suck.)

Over the 10 years I competed at the national and international level, my diet morphed from a fat/protein heavy diet with some delicious desserts, to one that was about 75% carbs (“good” ones, of course…ahem). I started to eat oatmeal (which I don’t even like) with fruit for breakfast, and pasta, rice, and potatoes for dinner. I felt worse and worse. My sleep got all wonky, and my stomach became a mess. Worst of all, I had a hard time finishing races because I was barfing all the time.

But still I persisted. I just needed to eat the “right” carbs. Cut out gluten. Eat whole grain pasta and white rice. Drop the dairy.

Nothing worked. I felt worse. And I was getting fatter.

I started hearing about people doing Low Carb High Fat, but I thought they were morons. Come on, I thought. The EXPERTS say we need CARBS. And LOTS of them.

Then, Tim ended up crewing for Zach Bitter during a 24 hour race in South Carolina. Zach was famous for being VERY, VERY FAST, and eating a lot of fat and not a lot of carbs. Weirdo. Yes, Zach ate some carbs, but way fewer than I was stuffing in my pie hole. I ended up dropping at mile 70-ish because I was spending part of every other loop hurling into a trash can. Sadly, I didn’t immediately change what I was doing (I didn’t trust myself), but I did file Zach’s plan into the cobwebby filing cabinet in my brain.

Fast forward a couple of years, and for every great race I had, I had three crappy ones. I couldn’t predict when my stomach was going to go south, taking my energy and motivation with it. It was beyond frustrating.

Somewhere in there, I decided to experiment removing all the sugar from my diet for a few weeks. At this point, I was eating a TON of sugar. Sugar in my coffee before I ran. Gatorade and candy during my runs. Full-on carb meals after my runs. I hd no plan to go “low carb”, just to cut out the white (and so delicious) poison.

I. Thought. I. Was. Going. To. Die.

Seriously. I was one step away from tweaking. During the first week, I could not walk up a flight of stairs without getting dizzy. Every afternoon, I had to lie down simply to muster up enough energy to make dinner. I was loading up on electrolytes just like everyone said, but I was suffering major sugar withdrawals. It was scary, no kidding.

Fast forward a year and a half later, and I feel like my “old” self. I sleep through the night. My stomach is my friend, not my mortal enemy. I never get nauseous when I train or race. I have unlimited, stable energy – no ups, downs, or bottoming out. I effortlessly stay at my old “racing” weight from when I was most competitive.

There is a lot of debate about whether keto, LCHF, or high carb is best for endurance athletes, and you can find an “expert” to support each approach. I don’t believe there is a “one-size-fits-all” solution. Everyone is different and different approaches work for different people. And while it is really important to do research, and try to fuel your body as best possible for the amount of work you are doing, I do believe you have to listen to your body. When I did that, I felt strong, stable, and capable. When I started ignoring my body, supplanting “expert” opinions for my own, I spiraled slowly towards feeling and performing like crap. I had to get back in touch with what I really needed, what worked for MY body.

Today, I’m basically back to where I was when I felt my best. Back when I didn’t know there was a label for the way I ate. Back when I just ate what I REALLY wanted, and avoided what made me feel like crap. For me, that is hearty food full of fat and protein. If I eat carbs, I make sure they come from stuff I truly want. Like really good fruit. A loaded baked potato. Chips and guacamole.

And doughnuts.

Just not ALL. The. Doughnuts.


Now that I’m more of an adventurer than a competitive runner, I have a lot more flexibility with my Saturday long runs. Gone are the days of Saturday fast 20 milers on the track and 20 mile hill repeats. I’m not saying I won’t incorporate some of those things if I pick another big race, but for now, I’m really enjoying the long “journey” runs.

First of all, I get to wake up whenever I want. So maybe I’m still wide awake at 3:45, but dammit, if I want to wake up at 4:15 I can. Stop bossing me! Second, I get to go wherever I want. Up the mountain? Why not? Along the river? Sure! To New Mexico? Who’s going to stop me? There is no one to complain about too many (or not enough) hills, the traffic, the isolation, the cold, the heat. Actually, I complain about all of those things, but it is waaaaaaaay more annoying when other people do it.

Journey runs through the city, what I do mostly, are fascinating. To keep it interesting, you have to go places in your own town you’ve probably never spent much, if any, time in. And oddly, I find that if you are wearing a pack, people are super friendly. I don’t know if it’s the “freak” factor (as in: Who the hell is running through my neighborhood in the snow/rain/102 degree heat wearing a suitcase?), or if I just look friendly. Either way, I just smile and wave. And they always wave back.

And, they never complain.


I’m so under caffeinated, I can’t even come up with a title.

January 10, 2019

  I’m doing the black coffee experiment. Again. Sigh. I keep hearing the phrase, “We can do hard things.” I’m inspired by it. I quote it to my kids. I believe it. Mostly. After three days of straight black coffee, I think the phrase should be modified to, “We can do hard things EXCEPT BE […]

Read the full article →

Flourless Cheese Souffles (Or: You’re All That on a simple Wednesday)

October 15, 2018

Ever since Tim figured out he has a wheat allergy (the anaphylaxis kind, not the intolerance kind), I’ve had to really make an effort to rework favorite recipes to be wheat-free. Keto doesn’t necessarily mean wheat-free, but that is the route Tim needs to follow, so I’m constantly trying to make new things that he […]

Read the full article →

Parmesan Chive Scones (Keto/LCHF)

October 2, 2018

Bread, bread, bread. Oh, keto/lchf, you have done so much for me, but your bread game is sorely lacking. Or so I thought. Then I found Carrie Brown and her cheddar chive biscuits. Um, yes, thank you, Carrie. And after a few very happy batches of her savory, bready (yes, actual bread-ness) creations, it was […]

Read the full article →

Chocolate Cream Parfait (Or: If KFC grew up, had babies, and was adulting) keto, LCHF

September 25, 2018

Back in the early 80s, a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken (it was not yet KFC) Extra Crispy was a TREAT. Trust me on this if you were not yet alive and can’t believe this to be true. A couple of times a year, my mom and I would load up in the family land […]

Read the full article →

Almond Hummus (Because we shouldn’t have to live without hummus.) keto, paleo, dairy free, vegan

September 19, 2018

Hummus feels like one of those things that, one day you’ve never even heard of, and then the next, you feel like you must eat it. EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. FOREVER. I looooooooove hummus. So, when we went mostly keto, I missed it tragically. I mean, like, I had to avoid my favorite Mediterranean restaurant altogether […]

Read the full article →

I Don’t Eat Tweety Birds Anymore

July 24, 2018

Paleo Chocolate Caramel Cake   As a kid, I always coveted the store-bought birthday cakes with neon cartoon characters on them that all my friends had at their parties. My mom was more of a make-it-from-scratch kind of lady. Which I hated. Sort of. I mean, I loved homemade deserts AT HOME, where they belonged, […]

Read the full article →

The Meander Compulsion

July 19, 2018

Saturday, I ran the city – Westside to Eastside, mountains to plains. I needed 25 miles, and I needed to try out the new pack I bought to wear on my run along the Thames next month. For the first 10 miles, some of my favorite running friends joined me. We started midway up the […]

Read the full article →

Run Wild

July 13, 2018

Wow! Training in this heat has been a bear. Now that I’m (slightly) older, I’m a little more concerned about my skin. Since I sweat like a maniac, I hate wearing a lot of sunscreen. This leaves me with two options: lots of clothing, or the treadmill. Neither are the best option, but you do […]

Read the full article →